There is nothing so practical as a good theory. - Kurt Lewin*
In this series of blogs, I’m selecting the Enneagram theories that I believe are the most accurate and most useful. I think it is essential, especially as the Enneagram grows and expands in usage, that we each think rigorously about which aspects of Enneagram theory are both true (or true-enough) and useful, allowing us to understand ourselves and grow in ways we might not do as well without them.
In this, the second, blog, I have chosen psychological defense mechanisms and the Enneagram. The rationale for this choice is that I believe that understanding the psychological defense mechanisms for each type are absolutely essential for our psychological development, but just as important, for our spiritual development and overall consciousness.
I want to explain my bias. I am a trained Gestalt therapist – though not a licensed psychotherapist – having trained with direct students of Fritz Perls. I have also followed a non-denominational spiritual practice for over 30 years, one that is more Eastern than Western. I have seen so many people grow psychologically and when they do, they usually – but not always – make inroads in the spiritual dimension as well. I have seen people who believe themselves to be spiritually evolved – and perhaps they are – who have gaping holes in their self-development. There are others who are highly engaged spiritually, but a mess psychologically. This latter group has taken what is known as a “spiritual bypass,” meaning they have bypassed doing their psychological work because they have convinced themselves that doing spiritual work makes the psychological unnecessary. They are “unworked” psychologically, meaning not very deeply aware of how they think, what they feel, and the consequences of what they do.
I have always valued doing psychological and spiritual growth, sometimes in tandem, at other times in an alternating fashion. But the interface between the psychological and spiritual realms offered by the Enneagram has been one of its biggest attractions for me.
I use the following criteria before I use a theory in my work: - What is it?
- Who is the source; is that source reliable?
- Is it a true enough model or theory that describes some aspect of reality better than other models?
- Is it practical and useful; does it help us do something we can’t do as well without it?
Psychological Defense Mechanisms What is it? Defense mechanisms are unconscious psychological strategies used by individuals to deal with uncomfortable and difficult situations. These mechanisms work to reduce a person’s anxiety, sadness, and/or anger and to maintain his or her self-image. Individuals of all Enneagram styles use a variety of defense mechanisms, sometimes at the same time but also at different times; however, specific defense mechanisms are strongly associated with each style, and these style-based coping strategies are most obvious when individuals are dealing with difficult issues.
In terms of the Enneagram, understanding the primary defense mechanism of each style is a major key to unlocking the ego’s hold on us; the ego has nine specific forms, called Enneatypes. The stronger the defensiveness – and particularly the primary defense mechanism – the more active the ego is indicating self-defense. As a result, if we want to allow the ego to show itself in more pure form so we can explore, examine, and grow by reducing the ego’s hold on us, we find that underneath the defense there is a treasure trove of unexplored possibilities. In fact, we may conclude that this defense, something that protected us early on, is no longer needed or only needed when we choose to call upon its services.
Here the list of primary defense mechanisms by type, followed by a more in-depth explanation of each: Ones: Reaction Formation Twos: Repression Threes: Identification Fours: Introjection Fives: Isolation Sixes: Projection Sevens: Rationalization Eights: Denial Nines: Narcotization
Ones: Reaction Formation Reaction Formation is a defense mechanism by which individuals reduce or try to eliminate anxiety caused by their own thoughts, feelings, or behaviors that they consider unacceptable by responding in a manner that is the exact opposite of their real responses. The One’s active inner critic dictates what is acceptable based on social mores, contextual expectations, and moral principles, and reaction formation becomes a defensive remedy when Ones experience what they deem “unacceptable” reactions. A subtle example often seen in Ones is when they dislike someone yet are especially nice and polite to this person. A more blatant example – one that is not exclusive to Enneagram style Ones – is an individual who crusades against corporate corruption, only to be discovered later as having embezzled money from the organization.
Twos: Repression Repression is a defense mechanism by which individuals hide information about themselves from themselves – for example, feelings, desires, wishes, aversions, fears, and needs – that are too difficult to acknowledge consciously. However, the repressed information doesn’t disappear; instead, expression of the repressed data is controlled or held down while it continues to influence the individual’s behavior. For example, Twos may feel anxious and need reassurance, but they may be only minimally aware of this. Instead of exploring these feelings or seeking comfort, the Two reassures another person who appears to be in distress.
Threes: Identification Identification is a psychological defense mechanism in which a person unconsciously incorporates attributes and characteristics of another person into his or her own personality and sense of self. Identification is a way of bolstering one’s self-esteem by forming an imaginary or real alliance with an admired person, then taking on that person’s characteristics. When Threes model their own behavior after someone else or the idea they have of someone, they are usually not aware they are doing so. For this reason, it becomes complicated for them to untangle who they really are from this image. In particular, Threes identify most with images of individuals who are admired in the Three’s desired social context, and the image with which Threes identify often changes as their context changes.
Fours: Introjection Introjection is a counter-intuitive defense mechanism. Instead of repelling critical information and negative experiences that can cause a person anxiety or pain, individuals introject the information – that is, they fully absorb, internalize, and incorporate these data into their sense of self. Fritz Perls, the father of Gestalt Therapy, refers to this phenomenon as swallowing something whole without being able to differentiate between information that is true from information that is untrue. Fours introject negative information – and repel positive data – about themselves as a way of coping with painful information and neutralizing external threats. They prefer to deal with self-inflicted damage rather than having to respond to criticism or rejection from others.
Fives: Isolation Isolation occurs in Fives as a way for them to avoid feeling overwhelmed and empty. Fives isolate themselves by retreating into their minds, cutting themselves off from their feelings, and compartmentalizing – that is, isolating each part of themselves from the whole or the related parts. For example, Fives separate their thoughts from their feelings and/or feelings from behaviors, as well as separating their personal and work lives. Fives may also isolate themselves from other people and separate their relationships so that their friends never meet one another; in fact, some Fives even have secret lives.
Sixes: Projection Projection is a psychological defense mechanism in which individuals unconsciously attribute their own unacceptable, unwanted, or disowned thoughts, emotions, motivations, attributes, and/or behaviors to others. While the projection may be positive, negative, or neutral, it occurs because the individuals who are projecting perceive the projected attributes as difficult to acknowledge or threatening to believe about themselves. Because Sixes make these attributions unconsciously, they imagine that they are true, although at a deeper level they are not entirely certain about this. Although Sixes use projection as a way to create some certainty and thus reduce their anxiety in ambiguous, uncertain, or potentially dangerous situations, these projections – particularly if they are negative in nature – ironically raise the Six’s anxiety level. In addition, when Sixes project either something negative or positive that is untrue, they create a false reality without knowing they are doing so.
Sevens: Rationalization Rationalization is a defense mechanism by which individuals explain unacceptable thoughts, feelings, and behaviors in a way that entirely avoids or obscures their true motivations, intentions, or the effects of the behavior. When Sevens rationalize, they do so by positive reframing, justifying their behavior by explaining it in highly positive terms. Sevens use reframing to avoid pain, discomfort, sadness, guilt, and anxiety, as well as to avoid taking personal responsibility for what has occurred.
Eights: Denial Denial is a defense mechanism by which individuals unconsciously negate something that makes them feel anxious by disavowing its very existence. These can include thoughts, feelings, wishes, sensations, needs, and other external factors that are unacceptable to the Eight for some reason. Denial comes in a variety of forms. A person may deny the reality of the unpleasant information altogether, admit that something is true but deny or minimize its seriousness, or admit that both the information and its severity are true but deny any personal responsibility for it.
Nines: Narcotization Narcotization is a psychological defense mechanism in which individuals unconsciously numb themselves to avoid something that feels too large, complex, difficult, or uncomfortable to handle. Nines narcotize and distract themselves by engaging in prolonged rhythmic activities that are familiar, require very little attention, and provide comfort – for example, washing the dishes; working in the garden; continuous pleasure reading of books by the same author or within the same genre; going for a walk or a bike ride; engaging in frequent or extended casual conversations; or continuously changing channels on the TV. Nines also use daily routines such as morning or evening rituals to immunize themselves from being fully aware, and they feel agitated, irritated, or disoriented when these repetitive activities become disrupted.
The source? The idea of defense mechanisms appears to have originated with Sigmund Freud and has been part of our modern psychological understanding since his time. There are numerous names for the most common defense mechanism people use, and modern psychologists sometimes group them in categories from “pathological” to “healthy.” But even healthy people use psychological defenses.
In addition, Gurdjieff refers to ‘buffers” that keep the ego in place, although he was likely referring more to the fixations or mental habits that align with each of the nine styles or the passions – emotional reactivity patterns – that get triggered when our egos are driving our responses. By deduction and by definition, defense mechanisms are “psychological buffers” that keep our psychological egos in place. By further deduction, reducing the impact of our defense mechanisms reduces the ego’s hold on us.
In terms of the Enneagram, I learned the primary defense mechanisms listed above from Helen Palmer’s first book, The Enneagram. I would assume these come from the work of Naranjo rather than Ichazo because Claudio is widely credited with having placed the psychological aspects of the 9 styles on the map, thus adding Western psychology to the Enneagram map. Given that psychological aspects of type include defense mechanisms, my logic has it that Claudio deserves credit for this. In addition, when I attended his 27 Enneagram Subtypes program in 2010, he artfully reviewed these mechanisms.
Are they true? Can Freud, Naranjo, and Palmer be wrong? Yes, of course, but they are all extremely reliable sources who have worked with thousands of individuals over the years. Claudio, as a psychiatrist and student of Fritz Perls, would be likely to have the correct primary defense mechanisms for each type.
From my own personal experience, I remember being 20-years old and, on receiving a compliment from someone I barely knew, and said, “Well, I might be as good as you think I am if I weren’t so repressed!” In my late 20s I had a strange desire that made no sense to me at the time. I felt very constricted in space and longed to have a body-stretch pull on both arms and legs to give me more freedom. Of course, now I recognize that repression is the style Two defense mechanism, and I have been making great progress working to unleash more and repress less.
From my observations working with people of various Enneagram styles, the defense mechanisms map extremely well to the 9 styles. The additions I would make is for Enneagram Sevens. What I have observed is that if rationalization through reframing does not work, they move to blame of some sort (blame the situation or blame other people). A case could be made that this is secondary rationalization; that instead of reframing to make themselves look good, Sevens may reframe to make the other look bad.
Are they practical and useful? I believe they are extraordinarily useful because they are accurate and practical. Here are just some of the ways I utilize this theory in my work:
Identifying a person’s Enneagram style: When people are sorting through the styles to determine which one fits them best, understanding the defense mechanism often helps them differentiate between two or three styles they are considering.
Self-development: Once we understand our style’s primary defense mechanism, we can them observe ourselves in the throes of using it. Once we can do this, we can ask ourselves what is really occurring within us, underneath what the defense mechanism is protecting. In addition, there are specific development activities for each style that soften the effects of the primary defense mechanism over time. For example, when Threes recognize they are over-identifying with their roles in real time, they can ask themselves probing questions – for example, Who am I? What am I feeling that my over-identification is masking? Fours can establish better filters for negative and positive feedback so they don’t automatically absorb the negative and reject the positive.
Coaching: Working with a client’s defense mechanisms is key to the client’s development. Observing the defense in action and then probing what lies beneath is often a major key that unlocks the client’s key issues.
And more about defense mechanisms You can read a great deal more about defense mechanisms and the 9 Enneagram styles in my newest book, Bringing Out the Best in Everyone You Coach (McGraw-Hill 2009). The defense mechanisms for each style are described in more detail as are how coaches can best challenge the defense mechanism using a direct or indirect approach.
So agree with me, disagree with me, or add to what’s been said. But please don’t believe all this to be absolutely true just because I said so. Discover it for yourself. Explore, examine, and experience!
The next blog will be on the wings, the Enneagram styles on both sides of our core style.
*Kurt Lewin was a German-American psychologist of the early 20th century who is considered to a pioneer of modern social, organization, and applied psychology. Even more, force-field analysis, action research, and change theory all bear his name. Beyond this, National Training Laboratories (NTL) and the field of organization development (OD) owe their origins to Lewin and his work.
 There is nothing so practical as a good theory. - Kurt Lewin* Because I have 35+ years as an OD consultant, I have lived by this quotation from Kurt Lewin. Jerry Wagner, in his keynote address to the International Enneagram Association Conference in 2010 reminded us, with great humor, the need to question the veracity of the Enneagram theories we use: is it true, what’s the source, how do we know? And so what? In the next series of blogs, I plan to share the key theories about the Enneagram that I most often use, why I believe they are likely true, their source as I know it (the source I give may have had another source of which I am unaware), and why they are practical. I’ll also be asking a few Enneagram teachers who are part of the Enneagram in Business Network to guest blog on their favorite theories. I always use the following criteria before I use a theory in my work: - What is it?
- Who is the source; is that source reliable?
- Is it a true enough model or theory that describes some aspect of reality better than other models?
- Is it practical and useful; does it help us do something we can’t do as well without it?
The Three Centers of Intelligence What is it? Instead of intelligence being only in the mind, we actually have three Centers of Intelligence: the Mental (Intellectual) Center, the Heart (Emotional) Center, and the Body (Physical) Center. To be whole, integrated and conscious, to be alive, awake and centered, and to be less ego-fixated and more conscious requires our being able to access all three Centers and to use all three in productive integrated ways. It is more complex than stated above – for example, the Mental Center is not just about the mind nor is the Body Center merely about body sensations and taking action – but the complexity just gives more to debate for now. How the Centers of Intelligence relate to the Enneagram is something like a piece that helps us put together parts of the puzzle. First, three of the Enneagram styles are formed in one of the Centers: Fives, Sixes and Sevens are formed in the Mental Center; Twos, Threes and Fours are formed in the Heart Center, and Eights, Nines and Ones are formed in the Body Center. Understanding this gives us a way to group 9 styles into three sets of 3. In addition, the 3 styles within each Center share some common characteristics. For example, the Head Center styles are three styles formed in response to the emotion of fear: Fives withdraw from fear of intrusion, Sixes try to anticipate and plan in advance for negative scenarios or go headlong against the fear (counter-phobic Sixes), and Sevens try to avoid their fear of discomfort, pain and restriction by engaging in a continuous flow of interesting ideas and novel experiences. The Heart Center styles are formed in response to sorrow (some call it shame) for not knowing or accepting who they really are and creating a substitute image: Twos create an image of being likable and thoughtful; Threes create an image of being confident and successful, and Fours create an image of being different and unique. The three Body Center styles are formed in response to the emotion of anger and also issues of control: Eights express their anger directly and try to take control by taking charge; Nines are called “anger that went to sleep,” suppressing their anger in order to not cause conflict and resist being controlled; and Ones exhibit suppressed anger – anger that emerges as flares of resentment – and assert control by being self-controlled and highly structured. Second and equally important, since we all have all three Centers of Intelligence within us, the Enneagram can show us the way that each Enneagram style tends to use and misuse each Center of Intelligence. Thus, accurately knowing our style helps us understand how we effectively use as well as distort each of our Centers, thus paving the way for development work – perhaps it should be called “fun” and not “work” – that is specific for each style to clear up the distortions. As just one example, Enneagram Nines, like all of us, have common distortions in each Center, distortions that are specific to their style. In their Head Center usage, Nines can collect so much information from so many perspectives that they become confused as to which information is the most relevant or important. In their Heart Center usage, Nines can be over-empathic with people with whom they have positive rapport and under-empathic with individuals they do not, in particular, people who they perceive as chronic complainers. When Nines use their Body Center, they can distort with regard to steadfastness or holding their ground. For example, Nines can become overly stubborn when they perceive another as trying to control them, but not firm enough in maintaining, expressing, and acting on their own positions and beliefs, especially when faced with opposition. The source? The notion of humans having three Centers of Intelligence, each of which is equally important, comes from centuries of Eastern philosophy. It is not new, though newer to those of us who live in the West who have valued mental intelligence above all else. In addition, the work of Gurdjieff, a forefather of the modern Enneagram, focused not on personality types or distinct numbers, but on the Centers of Intelligence (as well the energies at each point, the dynamics and movements along the lines, and more). But, he perceived that awakening and balancing the Centers in each of us as central to our emerging consciousness. In more modern times, Enneagram authors and teachers Kathy Hurley and the late Theodorre Donson focused on the importance of working with our Centers of Intelligence. Kathy and Theordorre always said they were strongly influenced by the work of Gurdjieff. Is it true? I do believe it is true enough, although I don’t claim to yet fully understand all of its vast implications for our growth. Why do I believe this? Gurdjieff and his followers worked with this extensively and I have great respects for his insights and knowledge. Through discussions Kathy and Theodorre as well as hearing them present on the topic of Centers and their importance to understanding the Enneagram system and types, the notion on Centers and how they are used and misused impressed me. And from my own experience – my self-work and my extensive work with the Enneagram in organizations, I moved from “I think it’s true” to “I know it has a great deal of truth.” This is described below. Is it practical and useful? A resounding yes! Using the three Centers of Intelligence describes something that seems real enough, helps us identify our Enneagram styles more accurately, and helps us grow. It seems to be reasonably accurate and very useful; most people, even if they don’t know the Enneagram, can relate to this idea: my head says one thing, my heart another, and my gut is saying something else. This seems to be part of the human experience, especially when we are confused. When I use this concept in my corporate and non-corporate programs – I use an activity in which they walk around moving from one Center to the next as a way to discover their primary Center and their lesser-used ones – almost everyone relates to the idea of having three Centers and can even locate them physically. In teaching the Enneagram, I have learned that teaching it first by Centers and then the Enneagram types within each Center helps people grasp the system more quickly and readily. The Enneagram becomes a 3X3 system instead of a 9 number system, and this helps with absorption and retention. Thus, using the Centers of Intelligence is invaluable in teaching and identifying type. There are some Enneagram teachers who do an excellent job of grouping people by Center first, then helping them differentiate between the styles within that Center. The Centers of Intelligence are also useful for growth. From my own experience as a Two, examining how I use, misuse, overuse, and under-use my three Centers has made a big difference in my own growth. For example, I recognized that I over-used my feeling or Heart Center, undervalued my Mental Center for many years, and was ignoring my Body Center – actually, my ignored Body Center was colluding with my Heart Center to repress my feelings. In other words, fewer physical sensations and fewer deep feelings. In still other words, if I don’t pay attention to my gut (or mind!), my heart can do whatever it want without regard to other facts I actually knew. Also useful is how the Centers of Intelligence frame why we are working with the Enneagram and how to use the Enneagram for development. I often say this: Knowing your Enneagram style is interesting, but that is not the purpose of this work. The purpose is to gain greater access to each of your Centers of Intelligence, to use them in productive rather than non-productive ways, and use them in an integrated way, not as separate functions operating within you. And more about Centers I do believe there is a vast richness in working with the Centers of Intelligence that will be a source of rich learning. I’ve also learned from working with thousands of individuals that just because someone is a Head, Heart, or Body Center-based style does not mean they relate experientially to that Center as their primary Center. For example, many Threes actually report that their Heart Center is their least accessible Center; this makes sense since many Threes use their Heart function to read other people’s reactions to them, but not to feel their own feelings or to empathize with others. And many Nines report that they have most access to their Heart Center and the least to the Body Center. This also makes sense because when put your anger to sleep as Nines do – and anger resides in your gut – your Body Center as a whole may be taking a nap. What I’ve also observed is that most people have a primary Center, a secondary Center, and one that is more dormant, but that the secondary and dormant Centers do not map exactly to specific types. For example, some Eights are Body, Heart, Mental, but other Eights may be Body, Mental, Heart. I do have a strong hunch that Enneagram subtypes play a role in this hierarchy. Finally, some people report having equal access to all three Centers, and this is what I’ve learned from this. Some who say they have equal access to all three Centers actually have very limited access to any of them. They tend to be people who have limited experienced self-observing. And there are people I’ve met who do have almost equal access to their Centers. In most cases, there’s a reason – for example, a person who would normally have little access to the Body center but has studied martial arts for years; the person who used to not have much Heart Center access, but who experienced an emotional trauma and rather than contracting, opened up; a person whose Mental Center was not used very much, but went through a rigorous Ph.D. experience that opened up a whole new world. So agree with me, disagree with me, or add to what’s been said. But please don’t believe all this to be absolutely true just because I said so. Discover it for yourself. Explore, examine, and experience! The next blog will be on defense mechanisms. *Kurt Lewin was a German-American psychologist of the early 20th century who is considered to a pioneer of modern social, organization, and applied psychology. Even more, force-field analysis, action research, and change theory all bear his name. Beyond this, National Training Laboratories (NTL) and the field of organization development (OD) owe their origins to Lewin and his work.
The three Enneagram styles that emanate from the Body Center of Intelligence, Eights, Nines, and Ones, have three different ways of responding to the emotion of anger. Eights have a need to express their anger full-throttle; Nines convince themselves that they feel no anger; and Ones control themselves because they believe that is the correct or best way to deal with this emotion. The Body Center styles also share issues related to control and action. Eights like to be in control and to take fast action with big impact. Nines profoundly dislike others controlling them and they control through inertia. Ones control by being both self-controlled and highly structured, and they like deliberate, quick action that enables them to check tasks off the “To-Do” lists. Here are the five most important developmental areas for each Body Center style and a simple, profound question coaches can ask clients of this style.
Key Development Desires for Eights - To know and be open to the truth from the widest perspective possible
- To understand themselves and others psychologically
- To feel less guilty for their own behavior and less responsible for other people
- To feel strong even when feeling vulnerable or weak
- To manage their vast energy without imploding or exploding
One Simple Question: What are you hiding beneath your “bigger than life” exterior?
Key Development Desires for Nines
- To express themselves clearly and directly and to have greater influence and more deeply-felt authority
- To have a strong, deeply held sense of personal power so that they feel fully empowered
- To transform conflict into deeper and more connected relationships instead of avoiding it
- To work with other people from a sense of fully understanding both themselves and others
- To move from confusion to clarity and inertia to action
One Simple Question: What do you want; what would happen if you fully expressed yourself?
Key Development Desires for Ones
- To be able to continuously improve themselves without feeling that they have done something wrong when they identify an area needing development
- To be more consistently compassionate and attuned to others
- To be less critical of themselves on such a continuous basis
- To relax, have more fun, and feel more serene, especially when mistakes are made and/or things feel out of control
- To structure less and go with the flow more
One Simple Question: What if you let go – of your self-control, your structure, and the other ways in which you regulate or control yourself, your life, and your work?
You can read my new Enneagram-coaching book, Bringing Out the Best in Everyone you Coach (McGraw-Hill 2009), for comprehensive and subtle coaching methods, approaches, and techniques that work best with individuals of each Enneagram style.
This is the third of a three-part series on coaching with the Enneagram.
WORLDVIEW: Everyone deserves to be respected and heard: I must enable this.
NINES seek peace, harmony, and positive mutual regard, and dislike conflict, tension, and ill will.
Relaxed, easy to relate to, and accepting, Nines see and honor multiple viewpoints and are usually excellent facilitators, drawing out the ideas of others so everyone gets heard. While they value harmony, seek comfortable ways of relating, and are often adept mediators of conflict between and among others, most Nines are extremely uncomfortable with conflict when it’s directed toward them and even more uncomfortable when they feel angry with someone else. As a result, Nines keep themselves from doing anything that might generate conflict or create disharmony – for example, not being aware when they are upset, not expressing opinions or preferences that could cause discord or disagreements, and diffusing their attention by engaging in activities that comfort them rather than focus them on their own desires or priorities. As examples, Nines may do some of the following: watch television for hours, flipping channels on a regular basis; cut the grass or garden when they have projects at work or home they should be doing; go shopping, walk the dog, or even do the dishes in an overly thorough way rather than have a difficult conversation with someone.
While Nines appear easygoing on the outside, many experience a high degree of internal tension, and they are not always as non-judgmental as they appear. In addition, some Nines tend to satisfy their desire for comfort through the satisfaction of their physical needs – for example, eating, sleeping, and/or reading; some Nines submerge themselves in service of group needs by working extraordinary hours, which allows them to forget about their own desires; and other Nines find comfort in fusing or blending almost completely with others who are important to them.
In the following YouTube segments, you will see short clips of two famous Nines: the actress Sandra Bullock and the Dalai Lama. These clips are excellent examples of the Nines’ interpersonal style. Agreeable and relatively unassertive, the Nine interpersonal style is non-intrusive but engaged, open and affable, and they often express themselves indirectly rather than boldly and directly.
Remember: While we can all prefer rapport and ease to discord, for Nines, the pursuit of harmony and comfort and the avoidance conflict is their primary, persistent, and driving motivation.
In this interview with David Letterman, watch Bullock’s friendly and non-invasive interpersonal style, particularly the way she nods her head or says “yes” and laughs, as well as the timing of these behaviors. Letterman even describes her as “the kind of person who makes you feel better.”
Listen to the Dalai Lama discuss his views of conflict and human nature, notice his relaxing tone of voice, and watch how he creates rapport with the audience.
This is the last blog on the communication styles of the nine different Enneagram styles.
This blog was inspired by Ruth Landis’s insights about Discernment, “the ability to judge well.” The emphasis here is on well, not judge! You can read about how each of us, based on our Enneagram styles, can allow more Discernment in our lives. Ruth Landis is a Senior Member of the Enneagram in Business Network at TheEnneagramInBusiness.com.
We discern through observation and slowing down enough to see what choices we have available to us in each moment, rather that responding automatically and habitually. Today, try slowing down and experiment playing with your attention like you might with a camera lens, moving from close-up to medium shot to long shot. What more information have you gathered about any given moment by playing with your personal lens? Try making one decision today based on this kind of expanded information.
Discernment and Enneagram Styles
I’ve added the following to help us understand how our Enneagram styles can block our Discernment capabilities and how we can allow ourselves to be more fully in a state of discerning, being able to differentiate what actually exists from what we want or believe to be true.
Enneagram Style One
Obstacle to Discernment: Paying so much attention to errors and mistakes that you run the risk of being over-discerning
How to allow Discernment: Acknowledge and accept reality as it is, understanding that there is an intrinsic perfection, even in that which is flawed
Enneagram Style Two
Obstacle to Discernment: Believing that there is so much potential and abundance in everyone and everything (including you) that you minimize difficulties, limitations, and shortcomings (especially your own)
How to allow Discernment: Fully acknowledge what you actually know to be true about people and situations without suppressing or repressing your true reactions and responses
Enneagram Style Three
Obstacle to Discernment: Creating such a positive “spin” on how you want to be perceived and what you’ve accomplished that you don’t recognize important information that is already there
How to allow Discernment: First, acknowledge fully who you are aside from what you do – thus, being self-discerning; then, acknowledge all of your insights, even those that do not put you or others in a positive light
Enneagram Style Four
Obstacle to Discernment: Paying attention to what is missing rather than all that is present, then confusing your emotional reactions with what is actually true in a larger and more objective understanding of reality How to allow Discernment: Create a positive sorting filter that allows you to internalize truthful and positive comments, reactions, and experiences that come from external sources: then, create a negative sorting filter that enables you to internalize only negative information from external sources that is accurate and useful
Enneagram Style Five
Obstacle to Discernment: Believing you can discern everything from your mind alone
How to allow Discernment: Access your emotions and your physical instincts more completely so you can use your mind, heart, and body to become more fully discerning
Enneagram Style Six
Obstacle to Discernment: Not being fully able to differentiate your projections – the product of your own inner life – from your insights, which also come from your keen mind and intuitive abilities
How to allow Discernment: Because your projections are accompanied with medium to strong emotional reactions and pure insights have none, learn to tell the difference between the two by paying close attention to your own internal reactions
Enneagram Style Seven
Obstacle to Discernment: Moving so quickly and pursuing the positive at the expense of acknowledging negative information that you don’t fully develop your ability to discern what is true from what is not
How allow Discernment: Learn to be still, internally and externally, so you can access your ability to discern in a far more refined way
Enneagram Style Eight
Obstacle to Discernment: Having such a strong desire to know the truth and trusting your gut reactions so exclusively
How to allow Discernment: Be truly open to new ideas and people without rushing to judgment or taking action so quickly
Enneagram Style Nine
Obstacle to Discernment: Not paying attention to yourself, your thoughts, and your reactions, especially your physical responses
How to allow Discernment: Allow the dormant volcano inside you to wake up and express itself
When I decided to go to Germany to Claudio’s 27 Enneagram Subtypes program, I had thought about attending from many perspectives, but made the choice because my heart got very excited about the idea. And I had not felt so excited in a long time. From there, my mind kicked in to ask: So what do you want from the experience? I made a list in my mind, and interestingly, some of the items had nothing (or so I thought) to do with the Enneagram. In addition, I gained great insight about several areas (an implicit list) that had been in the back of my mind, but had not made the official mental list.
My Official List - To be with Claudio for 7 days
- To learn more about the subtypes, including confirming what I did know, correcting what I had wrong, and expanding my perspective on this topic
- To recover some of my Romanian ancestry
- To learn why my son’s 20 year-old friend and longtime family friend had been recently killed under suspicious circumstances
My Experience: The Official List To be with Claudio for 7 days This was easy to satisfy since he was there every day, was extremely present to the many people there, and I had some personal interactions with him that meant a great deal to me. For example, I reintroduced myself to him early on, and he didn’t recognize me at first. The story I told myself was that this was the result of my hair being its natural gray instead of its dyed color from 2004, but the truth was he didn’t recognize me, and this was not only OK, it was good. When I told him my name, he apologized for not having responded to a few emails I had sent, which I told him (and meant) that this was also OK. I really loved the 7 days and relaxed about not really having any connections with anyone in particular, just blending into the crowd more or less. Later in the week, we had some interactions in the large group – initiated by him – that were amusing and lovely. But a more important interaction occurred at the end of the program, which is described later in this blog.
To learn more about the subtypes, including confirming what I did know, correcting what I had wrong, and expanding my perspective on this topic This was easy to satisfy. I had a lot of accurate information and understanding, some inaccuracy, and a whole lot new.
To recover some of my Romanian ancestry My mother’s side was Romanian, but I knew nothing about Romania. From the pre-participant email, there were two Romanians listed. How would I find them from 180 people? They – Daniela and Radu – found me because Daniela saw my name on the list, checked out my website, and found me the first day. The three of us spent a great deal of precious time together talking about everything. In terms of my roots, they were able to tell me with some certainty that my ancestors were from Transylvania and had likely moved there from Germany. They even gave me a book in English with pictures of the various sub-entities that make up all of Romania. Daniela is a self-preservation subtype Four and Radu is a social subtype Three, both somewhat new to the Enneagram and very intricate, sensitive people. I was able to help them some with the nuances of the Enneagram; they were able to provide me with a wealth of knowledge and sense of the Romanian culture and history.
To learn why my son’s 20 year-old friend and longtime family friend (Jamie) had been recently killed under suspicious circumstances So I am sitting on the lawn during the lunch hour and Carmen appears, sits, and we talk. An astrologer and acupuncturist from Berlin, she is also a psychic. I tell her Jamie’s story and his birth date (an Aries), she explains that there are really only 6 signs, that the zodiac is a medallion with 6 signs on one side and their opposites on the other side – in this case, Aries and Libra. Pluto was transiting Aries/Libra during this period, creating great amounts of turmoil and upheaval externally. Any Aries or Libras who had large, unresolved inner turmoil were at risk during this period, and depending on other factors, POW! Carmen later mentioned that she chose to come to me some time in the morning, knowing the time would present itself. I am an Aries as is my son, so this really pierced my sense of being.
My Experience: The Unofficial List Equally important were some answers to questions I had wondered about for a long time. The first was why, given the types and degrees of abuse I experienced during childhood, had I not become disturbed or even a multiple personality. Having seen a few documentaries on individuals who are multiples, I would always say, “Oh, that happened to me, too.” The second question was why my deceased brother Stevie, also a social Two, seemed so arrogant in an engaging way (the passion of Pride), but my version of Pride was far more muted, harder to see in many ways.
Given my family background, how did I escape becoming a multiple personality? To make a long story short, the social subtype Twos were discussing our family backgrounds. Literally, one side of the table had social Twos who were treated liked special people for their entire lives (my brother!) with complete love from both parents and expectations they were able to meet. On the other side were social Twos who were born as special children, but then very painful things happened to them. I was last to talk, told my story, then said it was a wonder I had not become a multiple personality. The woman next to me, who had just joined the group after trying to find herself in several others said, “I have found my home.”
The next day she came up to me, told me she had a very similar background to mine, had been a multiple personality until 20 years earlier and had subsequently put herself back together, now serving as a therapist for individuals with the same diagnosis. By this time, another women had joined us (the first was German, the second Swiss) and I asked, “Why did you become a multiple and not me?” Their answer was clear: resilience. This is a psychological term for individuals who, in spite of severe hardship, come back from such things even stronger. It apparently comes from one of several factors; (1) having one person who believes in you and with whom you bond (I had a maid, Alice, who did this); (2) a religious belief that holds you together (not me at the time); and/or (3) something that anchors you, a symbol or object. There was a ring my mother had but never wore that was very beautiful and I used to put it on and pretend (thought it felt real at the time) that I was a real princess on a magic carpet in a beautiful land where everything was good.
So my question was answered. These women just appeared! Or did they?
How can two social subtype Twos from the same family appear to be so different? As mentioned above, in a family where each of his siblings suffered, he did not. In fact, some of our suffering was because we were somehow “not as good” as he was, just by virtue of not being him. He would even refer to himself as “Stevie the Great.”
The other difference was secondary subtype. Although he was a social Two, his secondary subtype was self-preservation. These Twos act more like children, privileged and exacting the care of others; they are willing to sacrifice the rights of adulthood for the privileges of childhood. So he had this entitlement combined with a sense of bigness. I am a social Two with the sexual subtype as my secondary. I focus more on balancing doing or being something big with a desire to give – and be important – to my partners, friends, and specific family members.
My Final Experience with Claudio The final activity of the week was a Gestalt Awareness continuum exercise in trios. As a trained Gestalt therapist, I love this activity and do it all the time. But this time, I was totally bored. It took me 4 minutes to “get” that this was the case, and after I said “Now, I feel totally bored,” I felt very alive. I realized I had been hiding the truth from myself. I didn’t want to know it. Not OK to be bored when I am supposed to be liking something or someone.
Claudio had said multiple times that progress occurs when you are in touch with your truest instincts and desires. I had a desire to give Claudio a hug, so I went up to him and said so. We hugged; I felt close to nothing. Instead of ignoring my reaction or wondering why it was not satisfying – was it me, him, blah, blah, blah – I thought, “Maybe it wasn’t a hug I really wanted!” Then it came to me. What I really wanted was to tell him how much he meant to me. After the program ended, he was by himself, I walked toward him and said, “I realized it wasn’t a hug I wanted; it was to tell you how much you mean to me.” Wow, I felt full of feeling and totally satisfied. Claudio, being Claudio, said, “Ah, that is so much nicer.” And then he gave me a hug.
The 3rd of three blogs on the 27 Enneagram Subtypes with Claudio Naranjo
First, a disclaimer! In this second blog on my experience with Claudio Naranjo at the 27 Enneagram Subtypes program in Todtmoos, Germany, there is no way to cover what he taught in the 7 days. The content was extremely complex and nuanced, plus understanding what was taught requires some context on the types, the passions and fixations of type, etc. that are beyond the scope and length of a blog. But I will try to highlight some of the content.
About the Subtypes There are 27 characters in the Enneagram, not just nine, because each of the nine styles can be divided into three different subtypes: Self-preservation, Social, and Sexual (or One-to-One). The subtype is the particular way in which the passion of the type (emotional automatic response pattern or driver of the type) mixes with one of the three instinctual needs (Self-Preservation, Social, Sexual). Claudio went into depth about the passions for each style, then discussed and did panel interviews (more or less) with individuals of each subtype (where this was possible due to both numbers of people willing to be up on stage in front of 180 people and the time available).
Why Learn about the Subtypes There are many reasons, and here are a few: - To find yourself accurately on the Enneagram and to not mistype yourself as another type
- To be able to know yourself in far greater depth so you can better work on reducing the ego’s grip
- To understand the particular way the passion of our type functions and drives our behavior
- To grow, develop, and transform at a faster rate (it’s never fast, but it is much slower when we have our type and/or subtype wrong)
Do We Have Only One Subtype? Claudio would say yes and no. What he actually said is that one of the three subtypes is generally dormant throughout our life (that is, it is the instinctual area in which we hardly pay attention to our needs), and two of them are more activated (although the subtype behavior is a neurotic way of getting our needs met in these areas). With the two activated subtypes, one is dominant, although when we were younger, the other activated subtype may have been more dominant than the one we manifest as we get older.
This becomes very interesting. We could be a (1) Sexual/Social; (2) Sexual/Self-Preservation; (3) Social/Sexual; (4) Social/Self-Preservation; (5) Self-Preservation/Sexual; or (6) Self-Preservation/Social. Thinking about it, there are really 27 subtypes, but there 162 variations (27x6). It was very clear to me there that the Social 2s were very different depending on whether their 2nd subtype was Sexual or Self-Preservation.
The question never arose about whether we all have a sub-dominant subtype as well as a dominant one. For example, could someone be only a Self-Preservation subtype without having another subtype lurking in the background as a secondary subtype. This is something worth pondering!
Subtypes and Counter-Types Claudio focused more on the counter-types (the subtype that thwarts the full expression of the passion for the type) than the other two subtypes. For every Enneagram style, two subtypes go with the flow of the passion; one goes against the flow. I believe he focused on counter-types because the counter-types are the subtypes that get most confused with another type. In addition, we could learn how the passion of the type appears in its less obvious version. Here’s an example. The countertype for 6 is the Sexual Subtype, the counter-phobic 6. They do not look afraid and appear to have courage, yet their energetic drive is fear-based, even if many of them are unaware of it. Called Strength/Beauty by Ichazo, they appear fearless using their appearance of strength (as in, “I can take anything on.”) to convince themselves primarily and others secondarily that they are afraid of nothing. Counter-phobic 6s can appear like 8s, but the drive is fear, not anger (even though counter-phobic 6s can appear angry, though not all do). Claudio describes these 6s as always “having their pistols drawn,” and developmentally, they need to learn to put their pistols (a metaphor for being “armed”) down. 8s, by contrast, do not have their pistols drawn at all times for there is no need to do so. They have other ways to make themselves appear big and powerful and their need is for power and offense, not strength for defense.
Subtypes and Centers Claudio did not talk about the Centers of Intelligence directly, but did make a passing comment that you can go through the three subtypes for each type and make a matrix regarding how they use of intellect, emotion, and action. So while he did not say “Centers,” these are the Centers: Head, Heart, and Body. He did not go into any more detail than what I include here about 7s, but I plan to map these for all nine styles. Self-Preservation 7: intellect/emotion; Social 7: intellect/action; Sexual 7: intellect/intellect.
Subtypes and Wings Claudio did not talk about wings at all except to debunk something that I had never heard before. In only a few minutes, he said that someone is teaching that subtype can be determined if you know the person’s wings and said that this is not true. He never mentioned the person’s name or any more about wings. I did not get the impression one way or the other what he believes about the wings.
Subtypes and Arrows Claudio did mention the arrows many times. The most common way he mentioned it was that behind each Enneagram style lurks the core issue of the Enneagram type (arrow) that points toward that number (known also as the security point, though Claudio never referred to it as such). Under a 2 lurks the angry 4 who can never be satisfied with what they have. Under a 4 lurks the perfectionistic 1 who is never satisfied with reality as it is and so forth. I would list them all, but he didn’t review them, only made reference to them, so this is another area I want to get closer to the truth.
Claudio also referred to both arrows pointing to a type as a reflection of the inner conflict of the type, one that the type is wrestling with. For example, the 3 tries to resolve the anxiety/fear and need for certainty of the 6 with the indolence (not knowing or being awake to who one is) of the 9 at Enneagram style 3 (resolution for better or worse, it seems, but that wasn’t clear). The idea is that 3s appear certain, hiding anxiety for the most part and do not appear lazy since they are “doers.” Yet, they do still experience anxiety and are certainly lazy in terms of not knowing who they are and substituting “doing” for “being.” Again, not complete review of this, so here’s another area of pursuit.
Type: Nature or Nurture? Claudio never explicitly said whether he believes Enneagram type is the product of nature, nurture, or a combination. But he did say this: temperament is not the same as “character” and that we are born with a certain temperament. ”Character” appears later and while there is an associative relationship between the two, specific temperaments in infants do not map exactly to specific “characters” (Enneagram types). He also said that the passion (emotional response pattern of the type) appears at about age 4, while the fixation (false mental assumptions of the type) appear at about age 7-8. Before then, the cognitive development of the child is insufficiently developed to articulate such a thing (reference to the work of Piaget).
Subtypes and Development According to Claudio, subtype does matter for development. He gave the example of 6s in terms of what each of the subtypes must come to terms with or give up to lessen the ego’s hold. Sexual subtype 6s must let go of their “pistols” (disarm themselves as a way of defending against the fear); Social 6s must let go a needing to know and live by the rules (so nothing bad happens to them); and Self-Preservation 6s must let go of their deep distrust (fear and doubt) in themselves. Again, Claudio went over some of these for each type, but not all.
Summary I hope I am doing justice to what was said, as I wrote this without reviewing my notes as a way to assess how much I had internalized. Many questions were answered there, and many new ones arose. My experience of Claudio there is that while he knows this material better than anyone, he is still learning and exploring. No wonder it is so hard for anyone to write an accurate and comprehensive book about subtypes. Just when you think you have it, something new emerges.
The 2nd of three blogs on the 27 Enneagram Subtypes with Claudio Naranjo
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